A Critical Mass for the Critical Mess

I personally think we need to kill Sunday School and Confirmation before it kills the church.

I don’t know a lot, but from my experience in working in two large churches and consulting a few thousand of them over the last 15 years, I do know that we need a critical mass of change agents across the church to deal with the critical mess of our present parent-less model of Christian education. 225 years of Sunday School “drop off” expectations will not go away easily.

This will require a systems approach to the systems problem.

It will also require a shift in thinking from being mostly PROGAM/SERVICE providers, to a system that rewires our leaders/pastors/staffs to see themselves as PROCESS/MINISTRY encouragers and enablers through a significant partnership with parents.

FOUR BIG QUESTIONS

1. FAMILY MINISTRY: The big question for family ministry is - “What are we trying to accomplish?” Families doing programs, or families doing ministry?

Your church may do PROGRAM as good or better than 98% of the churches out there, but providing a staff-driven PROGRAM once a week vs a parent-engaged nightly PROCESS means that the bulk of the kids will fall through the cracks. You will continue to enable and promote the “drop off” mentality. You’ll always be looking for the next slickest thing to attract and hold their attention in an increasingly busy and distracting world. (“Don’t give me one more thing!”) And you’ll never be able to hire enough staff to do the parents’ job for them.

2. SUNDAY SCHOOL: The big question for Sunday school ministry is also - “What are we trying to accomplish?” Are we attempting to create Christian education as a weekly program/service FOR the parents, or a nightly process/ministry WITH the parents?

3. CONFIRMATION MINISTRY:  The big question for confirmation is also - “What are we trying to accomplish?” Dumping doctrine OR capturing their imagination for Jesus and bonding living cells in the body of Christ?

Dumping doctrine into a hormonally challenged child who’s pre-frontal cortex won’t be wired up for another 12 years doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. It’s actually counter-productive. Might I say stupid?

Loving adolescents into the arms of Jesus, injecting the DNA of Christ into the nucleus of a living cell of friends having a blast together at church, and incubating that faith “every night in every home" – now that’s another matter entirely.

4. YOUTH MINISTRY: Ditto for youth ministry – Youth doing ministry, or youth doing programs.

It goes on and on and on like a bad sermon. Sophomores, juniors and seniors don’t have time for one more program. They will, however, always find/make time for their friends. From my experience at a church that focuses on mission every where you look (Trinity/Stillwater), my own kids are so jazzed about Christian service – where they get their hands dirty and can see the direct results of their actions for God in smiling faces and lives transformed – that they  LOVE their church for giving them the opportunity to serve in significant ways. The church who calls them to significant leadership with their gifts, talents and friends – that church will grow a new generations of young adults who will see the church as vital community, not peripheral programming.

Be a church from the book of James, and you will be real to the young people. Be real, heal, and steal their hearts for Jesus.

I would appreciate your comments. And please pass this link on to your board, your colleagues, or anyone who you think might want to wade into the conversation.

(PS –  I’m in 75 locations this year www.faithink.com/training if you’d like to wade into this discussion in person.)

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[Gary Bauch]

Hey! As a veteran of 21(oops - 22) years of ministry, I agree with you Rich. Sunday School may have been created with good intentions, but it just created an excuse for lazy parents to drop off their kids and check off Christian Education from their list of responsibilities.

I grew up in a home where we talked about what we were learning in Sunday School (after we had walked to church and back uphill both ways). I am a Christian today, by God's abundant grace, to be sure, but also by virtue of the fine example my mom and dad set by making living their faith the highest priority in their lives. Sure, I learned in Sunday School, but it was undergirded by what I was learning at home and by what I absorbed as I observed my folks living out their faith by worshiping, serving and being Christ to my brothers and others.

We are in the midst of a mind-numbing cultural shift - check out "shift happens" on Youtube if you don't believe me. Talk to they young ones and see what is on their minds and learn about how they connect with the world and with other people. It is time to wake up the parents and give them back what they gave to the Church too many years ago. Its time for the church to find ways to creatively engage these young minds and hearts and bring Christ to them (whereveer they are). They may not come to church! But then, Jesus didn't say put up a building and wait for the people to stream to the church. He said, "GO!"

To do nothing will spell the death of the church (at least the one you worship in).

[Rob Gieraltowski]

It's a beautiful mess isn't it? We need more Melheims in the Lutheran church to open the blinds and get us to decide to dust, move furniture around, ditch the old couch or clean the carpet. Heck, maybe we're not even in the right room, or house?

It's painfully clear to most, that families have the greatest potential for Christ-growth through meaningful discipleship, worship, evangelism, service and fellowship. It's such a culture-shock that few of us want to move away from our comforts. Kids here, parents there. Program this, program that. Presto change-o. Is there an illusion behind our comfort?

Our churches in general separate people into who "can do," who has authority to do what. Perhaps our pastoral call to Word and Sacrament has helped shape this disconnect. The average "joe" in the pew hasn't been inspired to pray out loud let alone think they could lead a Bible study. Why? Maybe we've created this warp in mindset in part with our traditional view of the role of pastors. They are given unique and important roles within the faith community but that in turn may put distance between us and our faith growth? Only pastors can bless the elements and preside at commmunion and baptism. Only pastors are really qualified to lead Bible study and preach? Right? Authority is important, but in what context? This is a whole church issue as I see it.

What is the role of pastor, council member, teacher, father, mother, son, daughter? Can anyone pray? Can anyone lead? Can anyone serve?

A fine mess we're in... I'd have it no other way - keeps us growing and searching.
-Rob

[Rich]

Rich,

It seems to me that 'killing Sunday School' could be a one-size-fits all solution to a more nuanced issue. Is it really either-or 'a weekly program for' vs. 'a nightly process with'? I wonder. And yet, some of your insights are right on and we need to hear the critique if we are to be honest about how our CYF programs are actually affecting the lives and faith of people. What implicit messages are we sending to parents?

There's no doubt some things need to be changed, but the jury is out in my mind as to the 'how.' I have a feeling there's more of a both-and aspect to what will actually work in congregations, but perhaps that's the angle your working once you let the law do it's bloody deed on Sunday School.

We're currently in deliberations about how to approach our GodZone (Sunday School) program structure for next year and will be in the process of evaluating the impact of our ministries with children and families in the upcoming year. I will keep your questions in mind.

Thanks and Peace,

Chris S.

(Quick Melheimian Response)

You might want to pick up a copy of “Focus” by Al Ries. It’s great for helping you put things in a clear, concise, understandable mission statement that helps direct your future action.

It also has a whole chapter on how to make a memorable statement... A shocking statement... A true statement.

Yes, there’ll probably be a more nuanced solution... But a statement that says “how to incrementally improve Sunday School a little” doesn’t really grab, now does it?

Blessings to your wrestling match.

Rich

On 28/4/09 9:59 PM, "Chris Steubing" wrote:

[Randy Brandt]

HA! Nothing new here, Rich. Thanks for putting it into words all over again.

Your rant reveals the passion, frustration and journey of despair & hope you have in spending a life seeking some sort of life-paradigm the church can adopt through which lives might be more consistently transformed in Christ throughout one’s early (and then of course, later) years. Yes, there are plenty of obstacles that stand in the way via the church’s historical, institutional roadblocks that have come about. And it turns out that you are saddled with being one the prophets in this arena, crying out in the wilderness of Sunday school and confirmation programs.

Maybe your next blog should be a good ole fashioned lament!

Deliver me from confirmation, O my God;
protect me from those who would simply drop off their kids at church.
For no transgression or sin of mine, O Lord,
for no fault of mine, they leave the church as soon as they are confirmed.
Rouse yourself, come to my help and see!
You, Lord God of hosts, are God of all.
(Psalmheim 59)

I think I know the answer you want us to have for your repeated rhetorical blog question above, “What are we trying to accomplish?” There’s lots of ways to put that answer into words, but one way is, “We want every youth to grow into a living relationship with God through Christ and to live with integrity in it.” The truth is that is what we all want and have wanted even through our poor efforts.

But, here is the quandary that perhaps all of us (even true Finkubators) fall into: because of our broken, sinful human nature and utterly complex world, there will never be one, simple recipe to follow which will always consistently result in mature faith development. There is not one miraculous equation in which to plug in figures of people’s lives which will always equal our desired accomplished goal.

A simplistic “devil’s advocate” example: Can we throw out the confirmation program and have parents do devotions every night in every home with every child while knowing that 8-12% of homes include adults who are currently addicted to alcohol, about the same percentage of homes are estimated to have an adult struggling with depression or other mental illness, over 35% of homes with children are single parent with accompanying compounded stresses on time and finances, when 95% of adults (my estimate) have not grown up in families with any kind of dynamic, practiced faith in the home? How does a church funnel (control?) the mysterious, amazing work of the Holy Spirit to work in the lives of children and youth (and adults) with some sort of resulting consistent empirical evidence?

I agree: a huge paradigm shift is needed. Ordained, lay, and volunteer leaders need to take risks and break the chains of traditions that bind us in a restrictive death-grip. You have fantastic ideas, Rich. And you are selling them to all willing partners. But, if one step is throwing out the programs, aren’t the FaithInkubator models, just more programs?

[Duane Paetznick]

Rich, I'm hoping that the first sentence of your blog is simply an overstatement in order to get our attention. Because although Sunday School and confirmation are not perfect, in many ways Sunday School and confirmation (especially as practiced by those using "Head to Heart" principles)exemplify exactly what is needed more in the church. Some of those positive attributes of Sunday School and confirmation are: 1) they bring people to church - and thus bring them to Christ, 2) relationship building happens in the context of small groups, 3) there is guidance by caring adults other than parents, and 4) learning the stories and language of the faith.

In my opinion, it's not a matter of "killing" the Sunday School or confirmation programs. It's a matter of remolding these imperfect but laudable programs.

I love your radical thinking on this and other issues, Rich. But rather than simply deleting two programs in the church where we connect with people and where people connect with others and with God, I advocate that we take advantage of the positive things that these programs already offer.

Sometimes amputation is needed - when there is no other alternative. But often healing and change happen from within the body itself - when the cells of the body are called to action. My hope is that your blog is really a call to action rather than a call for amputation.

[Mary Hess]

While I wholeheartedly agree with your points here, what I actually see happening is churches deciding that therefore they don't need to be involved with Christian education anymore. I'm all for family ministry, I'm all for energizing practices of faith in daily ways, but that doesn't mean we should stop learning! Can you find a way to make your argument in a world which sees Christian ed as ONLY Sunday school, so that getting rid of it, gets rid of Christian ed -- can you make your arguments in a way that invite people into deeper learning? That help them to search out more profound forms of education? And if so, then there's a very important role for innovative Christian educators...